UCSB White Student Union to self-flagellate for Harambe

The University of California-Santa Barbara’s White Student Union has decided to satirically weigh in on the debate over Harambe the gorilla by publicly abusing themselves.

The unofficial student group, consisting of 15 conservative student activists who vehemently oppose social justice, announced the event on Facebook, saying its members wish to protest the “injustice” of killing Harambe to save the human child who had fallen into its enclosure at the Cincinnati Zoo by self-flagellating in the ape’s memory.

The “protest” will begin in front of UCSB’s Cheadle Hall and will end in front of the University Center, where the students plan to unfurl a large banner of Harambe and present demands to UCSB “to stop being complicit in systems of oppression of the sort that killed Harambe.”

In an uncredited statement describing the event, the group cheekily refers to Harambe as a “person," and laments his death at the hands of "a system of oppression."

"What better way to kick off the new academic year by protesting this obscene injustice by uniting as one and existing unapologetically for a worthy cause?” the statement reads. "We hope that this event allows members of the White Student Union and its allies to come together to remember a great person and to protest against the systems of oppression that have resulted in his death."

Those who wish to attend the event must bring their own flogs, as the group will not be providing them. So far, only 8 people have registered on Facebook to attend the event.

In the past, the group has received national attention for releasing mock demands, imitating those made by leftist protestors at the University of Missouri, according to The Daily Caller.

The demands, designed to support “oppressed” students of European descent, called for whites-only “safe-space” rooms, punishment for those who stereotype white people, and mandatory “white cultural competency training,” among other intentionally outrageous demands.

In addition, the group has hosted events such as “International While Male Thanksgiving Day,” “White History Month,” and “Whites-Only Healing Groups.”

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